Next to my work computer, and hopefully soon at home as well, I have a veritable garden of Post-It Notes.
Each day has a color; for example, Sunday is yellow. I have listed all the regular tasks I should do at work on a Sunday…including the personal note to blog and pay bills. I am hoping that improving my memory for work duties–clearly visible for my boss and co-workers to see–will help me to actually keep this job. The only one I now have.
From July 2013 until I was fired on October 14th, working a second job at the Library was extremely stressful. I was forgetting all sorts of things, like taking meds, completing work tasks, etc. It was not until recently I’ve had some explanation as to why my memory is just so very bad.
I read the article “The Cognitive Connection” in Bipolar Magazine, a magazine I didn’t know existed.
“Psychiatrists and researchers are coming to appreciate that memory lapses and other neurocognitive problems—disorganization, groping for words, difficulty learning new information—can go hand in hand with the more obvious mood and behavioral symptoms that characterize bipolar.”
So maybe it is not a character flaw or something I can blame myself for, like some people have done about losing my second, higher paying job.
“Bipolar brain fog can complicate everything from succeeding in school to paying the bills.”
What a precise way to describe this memory meltdown: Bipolar Brain Fog! I was actually fired for attendance, but it all stems back to slipping off my meds and forgetting elements of my job.
I remember all the Post-It Notes and Day Planners and homework note books that got me through college. Time to dust off some of those tactics.
The article also mentions lapses in attention, which can cause lose of coordination and balance! Did I mention I fall a lot?
I highly recommend reading the excerpt of the article. I’ve also subscribed to the magazine and am eagerly awaiting my first issue.
This past week went a lot smother with the Post-It Notes; at least I felt a lot more productive at work…a pay period of 79.75 hours.
The only trouble, and my Mood Score of only 57% shows this, is the raging anxiety, sleeplessness, and irritableness at home. I see my shrink on Tuesday, so I suspect an increase in my Buspar.
More on meds later…